Fighting In A Christian Way

Again before I enjoyed my rest day, I had another failed call. We listened to that particular call which we did not know what the deal was. Personally I felt so disappointed and the more I read the QA’s comment, the more I lose my heart. I am keeping the job for many reasons. But just recently I felt something was not right behind my back. I know this feeling. When I feel something like this, I am sure something is not good going on.

I cannot really tell what it is because I don’t really know what exactly it is. I just could feel it. And I don’t want to know whatever it is. If people don’t like me as I am. Fine. Not a big deal. I live my life the way God wants me to. Whatever they say is not important. I will try my best to be civilized to them. Hopefully I could be an instrument to change their squatter-like attitude. Take note, I am not pointing anybody here. I will just keep doing what I need to do.

During our most recent Team Meeting, we talked about our upcoming Team Building. Everyone was excited about it – except me. I don’t know. Something is changing in me that I could not explain. I told them that if it would fall on a Sunday, I could not go. Then Alex said, “E di magdala ka na lang ng santo mo.” (Why don’t you bring your own image god?) I was really offended and felt pity over him. He is already in his thirty’s and he is missing a lot in his life. So much more important things in life. But I remained silent. I didn’t say anything. I rather not say a word or else I might say something they would not like to hear.

Each day passes by; I realized that I am becoming quieter and quieter. I just feel happy being the real me. It is me. The other me is dead already. I am back to my old self.

Last night, I fell off out of the jeepney when we reached the gate of Spring Homes in Bucal where I live. I know it should be very embarrassing. It was raining softly and I felt mud and dirt on my back but other than that, I was fine. It was weird but I did not feel any embarrassment. I just took off my shoes and socks and walked home barefooted. When I reached the gate of our apartment, I left my shoes and my T-shirt and I bathed under the rain again.

When I reached the Basketball court, I took off my pants and played around in my brief. I enjoyed the freedom it gave me and it was a great feeling. I let go of all the issues I had from work and the rush I was feeling for my new baby.

One more thing, Jason sent me a text message inviting me to our second anniversary breakfast of our batch in InfoNXX this Saturday but I don’t feel like going. I am not ready yet to see some of them including Abby. Forgiveness I already gave them. I think the issue here is that I don’t like answering some questions they might ask me about or I don’t like knowing what they are doing now. Not that I am not interested, it is just that…I don’t want to know.

Of course I want to see Maia and the rest of them but maybe it is not the right time yet.

While Gracia and I are doing great so far. We are so blessed that we have God in our relationship. Jerlie is even more excited than us about our upcoming marriage. There are just things which need our attention more as of now but in God’s time, we will get there. I am so excited!

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It Is Not A Ginger Allergy...

After my lunch, I got this call from an old man who sure had a problem concerning his credit card account. Thing is, I really never thought that I could feel so desperate to end the call because he was so...err, can't think of the right term! I was trying to understand him. Aside from the fact that he doesn't speak good English, he was eating every word he was saying. When I thought I was understanding his concern (finally) and tried my best to explain what happened and how we could help him, forgive me but he was so impossible! We were just running in circles. He kept saying things that were so out of the topic. I wanted to help him, really. But I felt like I would lose my mind if I stayed on the phone with him for another thirty minutes! Oh boy but we were like talking for more than forty minutes already and we were not going anywhere! Then, I am so sorry but I gave up. I offered an account specialist or account supervisor to speak to him because we are not, of course, allowed to release a call no matter how reasonable it is.

I looked for a supervisor on the floor and found Ms. Janey available. I am so sorry Ms. Janey. And you know what happened? They talked for like more than an hour! I was like, oh my, my AHT (Average Holding Time)! Ending was that we needed to connect the call to AST, Account Supervisor Team. That was...more than an ordeal.

Then before I left to go home to enjoy my rest day with long hours of sleeping, Ms. Shee talked to me about my, ehem, recent failed call. There was a comment from our QA, forgive me but I really don't know how to like her(Our QA). I can feel that she does not fit the job. First in the list, she does not speak good English. When I read her comments on my calls, my grammar sensitive spirit always gets choked. I am trying my best to respect her but how can you do your job better when you know...err, enough of this. I already convinced myself that she (Our QA) is nice, after all. It is because when we see each other she smiles at me. Okay, okay. And true it is that part of it is my fault. I just don't like her comments. Wrong choice of words. She is so discouraging and so unfair. Don't worry I am praying about it. I am still human, capable of feeling things, you know what I mean.

When Ms. Shee asked about the 'thing' under my 'balls', I told her that it was gone. She was happy to know that. She even tried to say that it might be just that...she could not finish her sentence so I did that for her,...I needed to ejaculate. I could not believe I said the word out loud right there on the floor. We ended up laughing real hard. And it's true. I am happy because it is gone. Now I don't need to worry about it. God healed me.

Last thing I want to say here is about my blogging life. When I read other people's blog, I still find it amazing that they are being read more than my babies (My Blogs). It might be I am writing boring stuff? I don't know. Maybe my luck isn't here. Thing is, it affects my new baby, the Prints And Tell for those who don't know yet. I haven't launched it yet officially because I am still for my friend Jezz to give me the Domain Name. And I also need to print on a T-shirt. So much things need to be done. In God's time, I'll get there. I know I will get there. The there, as the Pastors said.

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Bathing Under The Rain In The Middle Of The Night

Gracia and I just met yesterday afternoon. As usual, we talked about many things in life in the future. We also talked about our friends. We laughed. We joked. We ate. We watched movie. We tired our feet until we ended up in 7eleven in San Pablo. Our conversation was like no end that we lost track of time. It was almost twelve midnight that we had to say goodbye.

When I was finally in Spring Homes, it was raining softly. When I reached the gate of our apartment, I left my bag, the umbrella, and all my clothes inside including my underwear except my pants. I did not know what came to my mind last night. When I remembered the feeling when my hand was on Gracia’s thigh when we were on the bus to San Pablo, I felt my skin burning. It was like there was fire underneath them.

I was so sure that the rain was cold like ice because it is already September and we are located near the lake and the mountain. I knew it was very cold especially when you were wearing nothing except your pants.

The heat was consuming every inch of my body until I needed to adjust my bulge in front of my pants. I walked and walked with no direction in mind. I just wanted to feel the rain touching my skin, hoping that it could wash away the fire. It is because I did not want to do it again. It would only make me dirty.

I reached the basketball court. It was hardly lit. The rain was still falling softly. Sometimes the wind blew around me. It seemed like nature was trying its best to conquer the heat under my skin.

I played basketball with my imaginary ball in the watery court. It was funny when I realized I was created so differently. I was created to oppose the traditional concept of being a man. Okay, I don’t have a sport. For the ordinary people they would think something wrong about me right away. Well they are just ordinary, no matter what walk of like they come form. They are still ordinary which means they are not important, or at least, what they think on that is not important.

I might look funny to play basketball with no actual ball. Plus the fact that I didn’t know how to play the game. But I was alone. No one was there to say I looked funny or stupid. I felt so free to be the special me. I ran, jumped, and gave my best shot! It was relaxing. All the pressure from within started to subside. But my skin still was burning. I thought I had a fever already. But I felt okay except that I felt so warm inside.

And I did it again. All by myself. I felt guilty. Prayed. And played the basketball again.

Oh how many times have I broken Your heart
But You still forgive if only I ask
And how many times have You heard me pray
Draw near to me.
Everything I need is You.

All For Love by Hillsongs

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One Year in Sykes

So many things going on and I always pray to have more time to have them all done. Whenever I am given more time, I feel lazy that I let hours and days pass by without starting on anything! I know it’s my fault and, okay, I feel guilty about it.

Anyway let me congratulate Wave 68 for we are now one year in Sykes! I would like to thank and extend my deepest appreciation to all my new friends of Wave 68 namely Mine, Cherie, Jaypee, Lohan, and Jeric. And also to those whom we were with way back in the training days of our Sykes life.

I am also happy about it because it is my longest employment in my, ehem, employment history. Cheers! There, now let me tell what I did these past silent days and weeks.
Starting with yesterday, I was informed by Ms. Mayen that I needed to renew my NBI. I was like, uh-uh okay that should not be a problem. Then she told me they needed it that same night. I was like, okay I like the pressure. It is because that same day my Annual Physical Exam or APE in Sykes was scheduled. It was the total body or health check-up. Do I need to say here that I am coming from Calamba which is like two to three hours away from Makati? OK, enough of it. To make the story short I hardly had time to sleep just to get my NBI and I was so happy that I am now done with it.

Now moving on, I am still working on my secret online business which I am praying for a lot lately with God to have it blessed. Gracia said the site, or she might be referring to my online novel that is part of the site which she said cool. I like it when she said it was cool. For Gracia to say it cool? Ah, it should be really something.

The last time we saw each other, which was Friday last week, we talked many funny and silly things. We also talked about marriage and all that stuff. I couldn’t help but felt like excited and nervous, or pressured at the same time? Or anything in between. I really want to settle down, have baby with her, and live a whole new life. Of course I am still thinking of my finances and of my family and of her family and as a result I felt like I was having a migraine. Laughs! Well, we will get there soon as God guides as through it.

And before I end this post entry, we are so happy that we have Ms. Shee back on the floor. We miss her so much. That’s it for now.

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Giving Birth, Reunion, and Sickness

I got so busy with some stuff last weeks. My Victory life is doing so good. Every day is always beautiful. It’s now September! As for those who do not know, the yuletide season in the Philippines begins in September. Laughs! Seriously! We love Christmas because we love Jesus Christ so much.

Anyway the following are the tidbits of what happened lat weeks. Hopefully I can remember them all.

I think it happened last week, or the other week, err, can’t remember the exact week. Juvie had given birth to a healthy boy in Sykes. It was an instant hit. Everywhere I went, everyone was talking about her and her baby. I worried about her even if we are not really friends with each other. And they need money for her hospital bill which is accumulating as each day goes by. I wish I could help her but I have my own share of financial challenge. That is why I am pushing myself to the limits to start a business. It is not easy but the ideas are growing each day. I don’t want to catch another Ginger Allergy so I take one step at a time. Prayers are my most powerful relief.

There was also the Team Building of Incredibulls in Pansol. It was like a reunion, except Juvie because she was still in the hospital. I met Sir Ivor’s girlfriend who looks younger than him. She is a doctor. When you look at her face closer, you will more appreciate her beauty. She is really beautiful and nice, too.

I was a little restless when I had to say to Sir Ivor that I needed to leave by seven that same night. I had many reasons. And they were all valid. Sometimes, no matter how valid my reasons are, I cannot just tell them all of it. First of all it is not easy. Secondly you are somehow protecting someone else. And the main reason why I could not stay was that the next day was Sunday. I had to be in church. God is my priority. Now I have my priority list, it is easier to say No to many things if it doesn’t incline with my list.

Also, it was the last series of the Faith Series we had in Victory Christian Fellowship. I could not afford to miss it. And also it was the Sunday when the Holy Communion was held. However I missed it anyway because I was sick.

Last thing that I want to say here is that now Elve Jane and Dian are friends again! It is so beautiful. I am so happy that this happened.

Now life on the floor is getting stiffer and stiffer. I can’t blame anyone if they are thinking about new plans.

I am also worried with Ms. Shee because she was hospitalized. But now she is fine. Hopefully she will be back this Saturday.

That’s it for now.

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